The Door is Closed, Yet Nightmares Still Find Their Way In

[Severn Alderman]

Severn was a man of certainties.  There were few grey areas in his life and even fewer compromises.  The dedication he held to his cause was absolute.  His charge would be watched over and protected, yes, but her safety went far beyond merely physical means.  He hadn't taken the girl under his wing all those years ago because some politician had told him.  This wasn't his profession or assigned role.  She was his life.

The two of them had managed to piece together an unorthodox, yet comfortable life in Goldcrest.  Neither of them felt fully at peace within the confines of the city and the watchful eye of the royal family but they were at least able to salvage some semblance of freedom.  There had even been a handful of moments where he'd felt at ease and even smiled once or twice, though he'd never admit it no matter how hard Astrid poked him for it.

The sound from the other room stirred Severn from his light slumber.  It was an all too familiar noise that tugged at his heartstrings every time he heard it.  Opting to leave his blade behind, Severn moved quickly, yet quietly into Astrid's chambers.  The moon hung high in the night sky, casting a dull, pale glow across the bedroom.  The princess tossed and turned fitfully.  Bearing witness to such a display made the big man visibly wince.  It served as a stark reminder that not all of the scars the two of them bore were worn upon their skin.

Severn silently crossed the room and knelt beside Astrid's bed.  He reached out and carefully laid a hand on her shoulder, giving her a shake in hopes of gently wresting her awake.  "Astrid."  He spoke softly, his voice barely above a whisper.  "Wake up, it's okay."  He soothed.  "It's just a dream, Kit, you're safe."

[Astrid Brynn]

A child of war; not unlike many of the citizens of the world as they knew it. She was no different than the rest. She had experienced many of the same things as they had. And yet, these experiences had shaped the young woman in ways she wouldn't even admit to herself. Days were filled with distractions, but when night came and these distractions no longer were an option, then, then the nightmares came.

There was a moment from around the time Astrid had been six, perhaps seven years old. She couldn't remember all the details, but there was one thing that seemed to haunt the young mind; the image of a disfigured body, half of it black from sot and the other burned down to the bone. The smell of burned flesh hung heavily in the air. It was clear that this was the work of a mage; the flesh had been too purposely burned away for it to have been a natural cause.

Astrid stood frozen in place; she didn't know what to make of it. Should she move forward to see if perhaps, there was anything she could do for the person? Run for help? Hide? She couldn't move, she couldn't think. She could hear the still present flames lick their way up the walls and to the ceiling, making the entire hut tremble with anxiety. And just as the beam broke, she could feel arms wrap around her tiny form and pull her out of the darkness.

Green eyes flashed open, staring into familiar blue ones. She could feel her chest heaving rapidly up and down beneath the blankets. Her hair was moist and her entire body felt warm and clammy. She didn't speak; she didn't feel the need to. He could see it all in her eyes. He knew that much.

[Severn Alderman]

Severn just nodded. There was no need for words, they'd been through this before. He couldn't hide the sharp stab of guilt that he couldn't extend his reach of protection into Astrid's dreams and every time she awoke with that same, desperate look in her eyes it broke his heart. But she was okay, she wasn't alone. There hadn't been a single night when she'd snapped awake from the nightmares that haunted her sleep to find him not hovering protectively over her.


"You're okay." Severn spoke with a softness that belied his imposing frame. He couldn't invade her dreams and fight off the demons that came to her in the night but he took solace in being the bear that drove them away when she awoke. Reaching out, his fingers gently brushed the damp hair that clung to Astrid's skin aside, catching her gaze in the pale moonlight and offering a reassuring nod.

"The fires?" The big man pulled away and moved to open the window, allowing for the cool, night breeze to waft into the room. He didn't know how it was that he knew the exact images that had flooded her sleep, he just did. Perhaps he could see it in her eyes, maybe he had a knack for guessing, or, further still, maybe the same ghoulish memories continued to haunt him as well.

[Astrid Brynn]

His mere presence was enough to calm her. Not fully, of course, but for the time being, it was more than enough. She could still feel the presence of the dream tugging at her entire being, but right now, she rather opted to put her focus on the overly familiar blue eyes. She didn't speak. Not right away. She simply stared, focusing on her breathing.

Pulling herself up into a sitting position, Astrid pulled her feet up against her chest and wrapped her arms around them. "Yeah," she said feebly, a nod accompanying her meek voice. She wondered then, if these nightmares would ever pass or if it was yet another pile of demons she had to carry around with her for the rest of her life.

[Severn Alderman]

Severn slowly crossed the room back to where Astrid sat. He nodded faintly at her confirmation and let out a slow exhale of breath. It was difficult to tell which one of them took these nights the hardest. Severn's sense of helplessness when it came to shielding Astrid from memories neither of them could forget was only compounded whenever he saw the fear and exhaustion in her eyes.

"Do you remember when you were ten?" Severn started as he slowly sat at the edge of Astrid's bed. His tone was low and contemplative. "And you found that baby owl with the hurt wing?" A thin smile touched his features at the memory. "Then you used my bedroll to make a 'nest' for him?" He couldn't help the light chuckle that escaped then. It wasn't as if he'd have been willing to sleep on the ground for three days to appease just anyone who'd been so determined to nurse an owl back to health.

[Astrid Brynn]

A faint smile crossed Astrid's lips at the memory of the adorable little owl she had found. "Owlikinz," she replied with a nod. "Of course I remember." Severn hadn't been too pleased to find his bedroll used by a bird. In hindsight, she couldn't really blame him, but she didn't regret it. And at the time, it had been the right thing to do.

"Animals deserve our care and attention just as much as people do," she continued. After all, most people would help a hurt man, so why not help a hurt animal too? They deserved the same kind of recognition as anything else did. They were a part of this world and had as much right to it as either of them did.

[Severn Alderman]

Severn hadn't complained for a single moment during those three days spent sleeping on the ground. While he agreed with Astrid's stance on animals, he did think there could have been an easier alternative to bundling the bird up in his bedroll. Still, the big man had acquiesced to appease the girl. She'd insisted and he relented without question.

Studying Astrid's face in the dim light brought a small smile to Severn's features as she shifted to the fond memories of their life on the road instead of the nightmares that haunted her sleep. Those days were hard, much more difficult than the life of forced luxury they were afforded now but there were good times. There was a beautiful simplicity, especially once the Coterie forces had been pushed out of the lands and the two of them were left to their own devices. "And you were so heartbroken when he flew away while you were sleeping."

[Astrid Brynn]

"Of course I was!" she replied with ease - as if it was a simple fact. There was something about animals that touched her in a way that people never could. Perhaps it was their simple understanding of the world, or maybe it was the way they moved through life with such freedom. She envied them that.

She fell silent then, her green eyes peering out through the window. She couldn't see much but the lights coming from the harbor. She wondered how it felt. Being completely free. She wondered if it was as wonderful as she dreamed that it was. "Do you ever regret coming with me?"

[Severn Alderman]

A soft smile touched the big man's features as he recounted the memory. Times we far simpler before he'd brought the young princess to the steps of her family. While the two of them no longer had to hunt for their survival or struggle through merciless winters there were no politics, rumors or reputations that needed to be upheld. At least they had their outdoor excursions that drove Astrid's family crazy.

Blue eyes shifted to look at the young princess. The focused upon her outline in the dim moonlight, studying her for a moment. It was a strange question that confused Severn. He briefly glanced down, wondering silently if he'd said or done anything to raise any sort of doubt to his dedication. "No." He said, his voice unwavering. "Not for a second." A light chuckle escaped. "Maybe I regret bringing you to Silvergate Castle all those years ago." He said playfully, even though there was no real regret in that decision either, in spite of how frustrating integration into the royal family had been for the both of them.